How did they come back together? They went to high school together but never interacted. How do they now find themselves spending all this time together? What brought them to this point?
I agree that it seems a little short. Short's not bad if the entire story is finished in that time, but this time it seems as though you had to hurry and finish it due to running out of time. It seems as though there is more story there to tell.
I'm intrigued by the idea that when the tattoo's are finished, she is "finished". How does this affect the tattoo artist? Does he care? What is their relationship? Have they developed one during this time (I don't mean sexual, etc. but just any type of interaction-relationship)? Or do they just interact as tattoo artist/canvas with no thoughts to who each other is? You bring up that they went to high school together. Why? You must have had some other idea to make this point. What is it?
Anyway, sorry if these questions/thoughts are stupid or beside the point. This is why I don't like commenting on people's stories. I'm embarrassed by my comments.
P.S. Good idea. Love your first paragraph. This reminds me of two short stories. One called "In the Fields Where They Live" and another I can't think of at the moment. I'll try to remember it. You may like it.
no subject
Date: 2002-04-23 09:19 am (UTC)I agree that it seems a little short. Short's not bad if the entire story is finished in that time, but this time it seems as though you had to hurry and finish it due to running out of time. It seems as though there is more story there to tell.
I'm intrigued by the idea that when the tattoo's are finished, she is "finished". How does this affect the tattoo artist? Does he care? What is their relationship? Have they developed one during this time (I don't mean sexual, etc. but just any type of interaction-relationship)? Or do they just interact as tattoo artist/canvas with no thoughts to who each other is? You bring up that they went to high school together. Why? You must have had some other idea to make this point. What is it?
Anyway, sorry if these questions/thoughts are stupid or beside the point. This is why I don't like commenting on people's stories. I'm embarrassed by my comments.
P.S. Good idea. Love your first paragraph. This reminds me of two short stories. One called "In the Fields Where They Live" and another I can't think of at the moment. I'll try to remember it. You may like it.