![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
blustockingEvery time I look at buildings, I see jets crashing into them. I had to work last night, in the office, by myself. Rationally, I knew nothing would happen...but fear isn't always rational. I just sat there, watching the same news over and over, paralyzed and crying intermittently.
The discussion afterwards is making me almost as ill as the act and outcome.
I wish I were a New Yorker. I wish I could count on that kind of solidarity...not in this town. We're isolated, isolated like the U.S. is often isolated from the rest of the world.
I wish I could help. I wish I could be there. I wish I could hug those who lost friends, family, co-workers. I wish I could dig through the rubble and feel useful. I can't even donate blood and I have no money. I need to be around people who feel this. I need to be around people who aren't ignorant, apathetic, and/or full of blind hate. I feel so cut-off.
We found an apartment.
Whee.
The more I think about this, the more responses I read, the more people I hear forgetting, the more angry I get.
Just above my computer there are pictures, some framed, covering my wall. I just noticed three of them are of the New York skyline...forever changed.
And for those of you who can't understand why we're "shocked that it happened to us". Fuck off. When hundreds, maybe thousands, of your innocent countrymen die, when the landscape of one of your most beloved, beautiful cities is torn by hatred, smoke and fire, when you begin to fear planes flying overhead and even the simple act of boarding a plane, then we'll see if you're saying, "Oh, yeah. I'm not surprised. We had that coming." It's a natural fucking human response and one shouldn't be so glib in the face of such atrocities. I'm sorry, some of us are still processing. Analyzation will come later.
No matter WHAT you think, this was probably not directed at you.
I'm full of devastation; it's still so unreal. And I'm angry, not only at the individuals who carried this out, or the hatred that inspired it and those who celebrate the outcome, but at those of us who don't get it. Those of us who are busy pointing fingers either at an entire country or our own. I'm not angry at nations, I'm angry at humanity, or a lack therof. But it's amazing how the outpouring of strength and compassion shown by some can make the pendulum swing backwards...if only for a minute.
The discussion afterwards is making me almost as ill as the act and outcome.
I wish I were a New Yorker. I wish I could count on that kind of solidarity...not in this town. We're isolated, isolated like the U.S. is often isolated from the rest of the world.
I wish I could help. I wish I could be there. I wish I could hug those who lost friends, family, co-workers. I wish I could dig through the rubble and feel useful. I can't even donate blood and I have no money. I need to be around people who feel this. I need to be around people who aren't ignorant, apathetic, and/or full of blind hate. I feel so cut-off.
We found an apartment.
Whee.
The more I think about this, the more responses I read, the more people I hear forgetting, the more angry I get.
Just above my computer there are pictures, some framed, covering my wall. I just noticed three of them are of the New York skyline...forever changed.
And for those of you who can't understand why we're "shocked that it happened to us". Fuck off. When hundreds, maybe thousands, of your innocent countrymen die, when the landscape of one of your most beloved, beautiful cities is torn by hatred, smoke and fire, when you begin to fear planes flying overhead and even the simple act of boarding a plane, then we'll see if you're saying, "Oh, yeah. I'm not surprised. We had that coming." It's a natural fucking human response and one shouldn't be so glib in the face of such atrocities. I'm sorry, some of us are still processing. Analyzation will come later.
No matter WHAT you think, this was probably not directed at you.
I'm full of devastation; it's still so unreal. And I'm angry, not only at the individuals who carried this out, or the hatred that inspired it and those who celebrate the outcome, but at those of us who don't get it. Those of us who are busy pointing fingers either at an entire country or our own. I'm not angry at nations, I'm angry at humanity, or a lack therof. But it's amazing how the outpouring of strength and compassion shown by some can make the pendulum swing backwards...if only for a minute.
(no subject)
From: