I have a million windows open

[blustocking]

Trying to get things done on the computer, since I've found it repellent the past few weeks. Might as well get caught up.

My show opens this Friday and I'm discovering that I need deadlines and YES I can self-impose them. I finally finished this...



That photo was taken during installation and from my short height looking up. So, yeah, studio shots soon and the full length is here. Another detail.

I finished that, after it sitting in my studio for almost 8 months, in about 10 hours. When will I learn.

Rode my bike downtown to drop off flyers, read at The Pig for a bit, and went to the Arts Center where I mistakenly thought it was Tuesday. So, yeah, meeting is tomorrow.

Been commissioned by the Spencer Museum to do some China prints to give to their donors/volunteers as gifts. It's less than I should be paid, but more than I can say no to. So, yeah, a girl has to work her way up. I'm getting there.

Been reading a lot for Directed Readings. I highly recommend, King Leopold's Ghost by Adam Hochschild and Mountains Beyond Mountains by Tracey Kidder. Both phenomenal.

Still applying to grad schools, but I can't stop thinking about going back to China and how I should get this done. I could move some things around and study abroad for my last semester, but I'm not sure how that would benefit my degree. It wouldn't really. It would just be experience and do I need to pay $8000 for experience. Maybe grad school in Xi'an or Beijing? Guangzhou has a nice art museum, not sure about the school. Should talk to Pok-Chi. The Chinese equivalent of "starving artists" are far better painters than I. And what the hell am I anyway, a photographer or a painter. I couldn't teach Photo I for the life of me. I have no technical capacity. But I could teach Painting here. I don't know. Hence the "Expanded Media".
/tangent.

I'm on that birth control Yaz now, hoping that my cyclical depression is what is referred to as PPMD? Basically extreme PMS. Since it seems to fall on the 20th every month, this seems logical. Now, if that shit weren't $40 a month...ah yes, but people have much worse prescription bills.

I'm hungry and have now missed my favorite time of day because I've been sitting in front of this glowing box. Chicken, broccoli, and half a potato are in order.

Comments

[malevolencia.livejournal.com]

Hi sweet girl. You are missed and though of often even though I don't see you around my way at all. The piece above is lovely... breathtakingly so.

xo

[malevolencia.livejournal.com]

P.S. If you're still single, and interested, there is someone I'd like to introduce you to. He's about 6'5", scary smart, sensitive, a complete geek, has no "game", doesn't play games, can't stand "chicks" but would like very much to meet a "woman" with a brain and her own life, isn't rich, lives alone but would like a greyhound or a whippet someday, has a car, has his own place, has sisters (always a plus!), cares about his family, has no "issues", is a musician (and a GOOD one. NO REALLY.) and he's been on of my best friends for over 12 years. He lives in Wichita. His name is Ryan. He's one of the most beautiful people I've ever known in my life. He's been single for a long time because he can't stand most of the girls he's met, which I'm sure BOTH of us can totally understand.

No pressure. Not matchmaking. Just let me know if you're interested and I'll show you where you can see a photo. Got questions? Ask away.

xo

[i-muad-dib.livejournal.com]

This is awesome work. Beautiful textures as well.
How did the opening go?


-and why does it mater if you are a painter or a photographer? You are both and by the looks of it, rather good at being both.

I have seen unspeakable mediocrity teaching Photo I. In university. To me.
I laughed in class. A lot.
How horribly could you do?
Can you print B&W? I mean PRINT. You know...zone system, graded filters, the works. If so, you could do it with just a bit of study.

[blustocking.livejournal.com]

I have no technical know-how.
It just doesn't stick. I have an "eye". I'm good at composition. I know something about lighting. But other than that, sometimes, I feel like a total hack...in photography that is.

And thank you, by the way.

[i-muad-dib.livejournal.com]

You are welcome.
If I could get you alone in the dark for a few hours I could teach you a few tricks that overcome "technical know how" and allow instinct to work things out but alas, that will be difficult.
To me the darkroom is one of the coolest places there is.There is something awesome about seeing your work pop out of a white piece of paper and chemical burns. I dunno.
I hope that you don't give up on the tech side of it though. printing your own work allows for so much more to be done with a simple negative.
Tech know how comes with practice.You will get it if you want it.

[blustocking.livejournal.com]

It's not the processing where I feel like a hack, it's the camera. I don't know. I was reading a new issue of a photo mag today and I understood more than I thought I would...so maybe I'm just intimidated.

Plus, I have this friend (besides you) who's been making me jealous lately. She's really good at lighting and setting up a shot. And now she's getting good at manipulation. I'm just too distracted with other artistic loves and sometimes I forget that my fortes may lie in the ability to capture a good shot quickly (more journalistic) and a good eye for composition. I don't know. I'm going through a photographic quarter-life crisis.