zut alors!

[blustocking]

Oh look! 3/4 of the links to the left are now in French as well. Slowly, Livejournal....baby steps.

This is going to be completely random...in fact, I'm going to go write this in Word so I don't have to listen for footsteps and minimize every time someone walks by. So yes, combination of everything I've thought for the past few days.


--If some people weren't so attractive, they wouldn't get away with half as much as they do. I'm not sure if it is subconscious or if they know what they're doing. Either way, I have no time for it and I've been happier with this realization. Some people will always need handouts. Some people will always take a handout. Some people have no pride, no self-esteem and overcompensate by false arrogance. Some people are givers, some are takers, and some know how to balance the two. Every so often, I find a true "taker" and after many months of giving them the benefit of the doubt, it can be denied no longer and I have to be honest with myself, not rely on them, and quite possibly cut them out of my life. I don't know if this is the case in this instance, though think I do.
I can only go on what you give me, what I see. Actions baby, they have a loud, boisterous voice. Words can be quiet, soothing, deceptive. If you think you are being cheated, deceived, or lied to...look, don't listen.

--I went to AA yesterday morning at 7am, an ungodly hour. It was actually okay. There were only about 8 people there, 6 of them smokers (haha, it's true. get rid of one addiction, substitute it). They were nice. They didn't try and make me say I'm an alcoholic. They didn't shove God down my throat. They gave me a blue marble. Yes, a blue marble. Apparently a tradition in A division, they give you a blue marble as a first-timer and tell you if you end up ordering a drink, drop the marble in the bottom. When the marble melts, you can take a drink. Har, har, clever, eh? Anyway, I'll probably go tomorrow or Saturday as well. Incidentally, I haven't had a drink in over a month now and it doesn't bother me at all. In fact, I've never thought about wanting a drink more than when I was in that AA meeting. Nice, eh? It's good to know that I can stop when I have to. This requires no congratulations, as it wasn't hard. I'm not saying that to be arrogant, though it may sound that way. I'm sure I'm addicted to something else....something seedy and hidden that will surface later. ;) I plan on sending all of my AA stuff to my Father, which will piss him off, but I don't care...because he loves me and I love him. I am lucky.

--I was very late today. Someone was right, I should have gone to bed earlier. I should also stop being so stupid and/or stubborn. Je suis fou. I wish I could tell it's Crazy PMS Day before the day starts, not after. Luckily, it generally lasts only one day.

--I miss school. I miss writing. I finished The Left Hand of Darkness which was very good. I am now almost done with Nickel and Dimed(which I plan on sending to my parents when I'm done) and I'm about 1/3 done with Stupid White Men. I am also reading the new Discover magazine about the upcoming mini Ice Age and I purchased The State of the World 2002 finally. I also bought The Little Prince in French quite a while ago, the first trade of The Preacher, and a book of erotic travel stories. Odd, I know. I want more time to read. Too often, I'm too tired to even pull out my book on the bus. I was going to go and buy the comics I have been missing, but I should save my money.

--I am not going to Vegas this weekend. Though I would love to just go and support the band, I can't be irresponsible right now and the unplanned nature of the trip only added to my stress. When I started thinking of having three whole days off, to myself (mostly, as I'm still doing community service and going to the hospital on Sunday) I was elated. I hope I don't waste this. At least I can finally do laundry.

--locopuff gave me the most bitchin' present. It's a wooden bar sign that says "The Pirate's Pub". It has a carved out pirate's face in the center and under that it says, "Strong Ale and Fine Food". Arrrr. I can't believe how cool it is. Thank you, you sessy locopuff!

--I can't ride the bus without thinking dirty thoughts. There are entirely too many poles, straps, and strangers on it for my own good.

--After group on Tuesday, I decided to walk to the Virgin Megastore, as the bus comes 45 minutes after I get out of group. I lost my Jack Johnson CD (which is odd, as I don't lose CD's) so I was going to buy a new one. I am slightly ahead of my expenses, so I allowed myself this. I also bought The Vines (on sale $7) and this. All 3 were on sale. I figured since I'm not spending money on Vegas, I'll spend a 1/3 of what I would have spent on music, always a fine choice. I wasn't too fond of the only song from the Vines that I've heard, but it was $7 and I listened to a few songs in the store. And actually, it's pretty damn good.

Yeah....I think that's it for now.
I can't stop thinking about someone.

p.s. I just looked in my bag for my Ziggy Stardust CD set and it's gone. I think I lost it on the way to work. It must have fallen out when I pulled my wallet out to get money from the ATM.
Fuck. The roller coaster has not come to a complete stop...now I am fucking sad and pissed off.
Dammit, I'm with her.
***

Comments

[mspunkrockstar.livejournal.com]

yipes!
our weeks are so similar...its scary! um, the late thing? yah, me too. the PMS thing? um, me too just diff. stage...
oh- the having to write on word thing/minimize thing...? happens 2 me ALL THE TIME.
Btw- what'd'you think of Left Hand of Darkness? I remember liking it quite a bit...

Re:

[blustocking.livejournal.com]

yeah, I'm a freak though. My PMS isn't the week before, it's basically the week OF. At least I get all the crap out of the way in one fell swoop.

At first, I wasn't too taken with The Left Hand of Darkness, but by the middle I was liking it quite a bit. I really enjoyed the whole bisexual/semi-androgynous aspect. Heheh, I even found myself relating "kemmer" to certain people the other day. :D

Re:

[mspunkrockstar.livejournal.com]

hehe :)

[mrsassypants.livejournal.com]

damn you lost the best disc out of all that poop.

if you like the vines, check out who they ripped off from 30+ years ago...Small Faces, The Pretty Things to name a few and of course you know the Kinks and the Rollings Stones' 12x5 album.

Its encouraging to know that A)pretty girls ride the bus, somewhere out there, maybe not on mine, but somewhere, maybe waiting to transfer to mine and B)they potentially think dirty thoughts (ok i realize that you may be the sole exception but cut me some slack)

[blustocking.livejournal.com]

yes, yes, you are so "old skool". word. I know and respect of the bands before. But every band is influenced by it's predecessors. I like good music. Period. End of story. I can be a snob, but I'm open-minded. ;p I'm still hoping Ziggy fell out of my bag while I was still in my room at home. :(

I do ride the 217, just the other direction. :)

Re:

[mrsassypants.livejournal.com]

really? it only goes to LaBrea right? where do you ride it from? Vermont/Sunset, Western? What times? Maybe I can wave.



See, you misunderstand. I KNOW that almost all contemporary bands draw from those passed.

Thats not my point.

Im not ole skool for ole skool's sake.

There is no new music. Its all rehashed shit.

So, then im reduced to select from those who rehash it the best. Its gotten that bad.

One of my favorite contemporary bands...Stereolab. Who do they rehash? Everything from VU, Silver Apples, Esquivel and more. But they do it damn well, with a dash of ingenuity, each album being unique from the next, and they are truly talented performers and musicians. Thats the difference in my mind.


Groups like the Vines, Strokes, White Stripes etc etc are just mediocre. I wouldn't say they're good, just ok. I don't expect them to blaze new trails, but it takes more than a catchy riff.

Moreover, i resent prepacked music. I refuse to support a music industry that plucks bands like The White Stripes, or the Strokes and make them an overnight success, prematurely.

Most arent ready for that. Most can't handle it (i.e. Kurt Cobain). With the advent of music videos, whenever some talent rears its ugly head you have these corporate cronies on top of them like white on rice designing album covers and ancillary product marketing before the group barely finishes their first studio session.

The Vines and such are there in front of you because they knew you'd suck it up. Doesnt that bother you? Doesnt it annoy you that corporations think they know you like that?

Thats wrong, its a wast

[haddob.livejournal.com]

HAHAHAHAHAHA

damn character limit...

[blustocking.livejournal.com]

The 212 goes down La Brea. The 217 West goes to Fairfax and then all the way down to Olympic. One thing I don't understand is every other bus will go all the way to Venice, but the other one will stop and unload all of it's passengers off at Olympic and turn right. Inevitably, every time I've been late, I've been on the "last stop at Olympic" bus. wee.

(to be cont.)

[blustocking.livejournal.com]

If ALL you like is pre-packaged, top 40 music, then yes, I could see some relevance in your words, but that's not me.

You seem to be so caught up in your anti-corporate, avant-garde lifestyle (wait, scratch the anti-coroporate part, I thought I read you carried a Banana Republic bag) that you can't see things as they really are, but how you assume them to be.

So the bands you actually do respect and admire, they are original? Do you decide this? Are you the Music Guru, because I truly apologize, I was not aware of your title. Seriously, how far do you have to go back to find truly original music? Should we all be listening to Gregorian chant or South African drum beats? People feed off of other people. Hopefully, they take someone else's idea so far, that it becomes their own, it becomes more original than stolen. Everyone is influenced. Everyone. No matter what time period. It's evolution. And though I do agree, the rip-offs are getting quite blatant and no one seems to struggle too much with that bitch-whore creativity anymore, I don't think it's fair to write off a band entirely just because they remind you of another band. Give them some time, if they're good enough, creative enough, they'll figure it out and stick around. If not, so long. Doesn't mean I can't enjoy a catchy tune or a nice hook every once and awhile. Quit moralizing so damn much and just enjoy your fucking music. Which, by the way, isn't for everyone.

Incidentally, The White Stripes have been together since 1997. No, that's not old by any means, but as I enjoy their previous non-"breakout" albums more, I think it makes them a little more legitimate.

The Strokes, 4 car garage band. Daddy's rich. Big fucking deal, they're fun and I like that album. Didn't buy it, downloaded it, but I like it.

The Vines. They're good. Why don't you listen to them before you write them off. If you have and all you can hear is "rip-off" then fine. But christ, don't be so quick to dismiss.

The bottom line is, every band has their purpose.
Whether that be pure entertainment, revolution, or surgary tripe to soothe the kiddie's sweettooth, it doesn't matter. Like what you like, but don't think that what you like is the best and only choice. If you only like or respect bands that YOU feel are revolutionary, fine. But don't belittle someone for being able to like a wide variety of bands, no matter where they came from.

Now, having said that....I don't agree with what some companies are doing by throwing a band together, a product, before even having the members. But you know what? What if they're good? *gasp* NO! They can't be! They're pre-fab! That's preposterous. And what if they're not, big fucking deal. Don't buy it. They're make some bucks of less discerning people and that'll be that. (contradictory, maybe, but whatever)
So corporations learned how to play into the "cool culture" more efficiently. I see it, you see it, don't worry about everyone else. The whole world isn't going to suddenly start liking whatever Sony feeds them. Let the masses have their mass-marketed music. Doesn't mean some of us can't enjoy both.

I know a band or two that have been working hard on making it for years now. And though you don't agree on one of these bands, they are good. They are solid, they are performers, they are dedicated, and they make good music. Why SHOULDN'T they be given a contract? Why shouldn't they be respected? If they got a company behind them, pushed them into the spotlight, would that make them LESS of a band? Did they not pay their dues enough? Would you respect them less if they had help, even though when they started out, they were working hard. Does making popular music make you less of a musician?

So go ahead and buy your music to try and fool the corporations. You're not a sell-out, noooooo. You are a beautiful and unique snowflake, just like the rest of us.

I'm sure none of that even made sense. I'm feeling rather disjointed today

[buscemi.livejournal.com]

I knew what you meant. You made a lot of good points. Although I'm really not into the Strokes, White Stripes, or Vines, the fact that they're popular gives me hope for the music biz. (No, Entertainment Tonight, not everyone likes the Backstreet Boys or Broccoli Spears...)

Re:

[mrsassypants.livejournal.com]

wow...see you take what i say to an extreme.

the Banana Republic bag was a gift btw. Again, Im not anti-corporate just to be anti-corporate.

"So the bands you actually do respect and admire, they are original?"

No, not always. I was a musician myself of unoriginal music, but it was more about playing.

"Are you the Music Guru, because I truly apologize, I was not aware of your title."

What?? No of course not. Im giving you a weird, puzzled look with this one.


"Everyone is influenced."

No Shit. Thats not my point.

"I don't think it's fair to write off a band entirely just because they remind you of another band."

Thats not why I write them off. read what I wrote.

"Doesn't mean I can't enjoy a catchy tune or a nice hook every once and awhile."

Honey, i could careless what you like. I found myself attracted to some catchy No Doubt and Eminem riffs as of late. Again, your sorta missing my point.

"but don't think that what you like is the best and only choice"

why not? why not regard your taste highly?


and the rest of the blather...no, it made not sense.


bottom line is this, and this is why im so opinionated about music.

i come from a music inclined family. my brother, mother, grandfather, aunt, and uncle have all played music at some point in their lives.

i have played myself, though not much these days.

I consider myself well versed in a lot of music. Blues, punk, jazz and so forth. I think I have a decent working knowledge of music. This is not arrogance, its confidence, and initi

Re:

[blustocking.livejournal.com]

You say that quite a bit, "I'm not _____ just to be _____." Odd.

If you were a musician of "unoriginal music" yet it was more about playing, then perhaps that is what it's about for the bands you previously degraded? It just seems that you are assuming these bands are all corporate fodder. Which, I'm sure, some are, but it's not fair to assume.

The "music guru" thing was because you take on that matter-of-fact tone when stating your opinions.

I did read what you wrote. Perhaps the miscommunication lies in how you wrote it. ;p

As someone who obviously holds music to a high regard, you should understand how someone would be offended when you insult bands they like, especially bands of friends they support (i.e. Elseworth Dragon).

Holding your own taste in high regard is one thing, thinking it is the best and only choice is another.

It made not sense? Hmm..well, it made sense to me. Ah well.

Again, you're assuming that your musical background qualifies you as an "expert". I grew up with music as well. I am passionate about music. Doesn't mean I am any more qualified than Joe Schmoe. Perhaps you have an educated opinion, but that's just what it is, an opinion.

I wonder what the rest of your comment said. Guess we'll never know, eh? >;

[ares-dot-com.livejournal.com]

...Why are you so goddamn annoying?

>:)

[blustocking.livejournal.com]

*snickers*

He's not annoying!

[haddob.livejournal.com]

He's sassy!

one more day 'til the weekend!

[catnamedcosette.livejournal.com]

--I can't ride the bus without thinking dirty thoughts. There are entirely too many poles, straps, and strangers on it for my own good.

This cracked me up. Thank you, I needed that.

[blustocking.livejournal.com]

haha, I like your icon. :)

[motherevol.livejournal.com]

My friend, Tom is the marketer for Virgin Megawhore in LA.

He use to be my boss in Detroit when we were both working at the record store back in the early 90's. He is a totally fabulous person. You'd adore him.

He always has a smile on his face and defines me as a "broad". Lord love a homo. :)

Hmm

[locopuff.livejournal.com]

I used to be the world music buyer for the Virgin Megabore in Lost Wages. Can that bitch get me a job?

Re: Hmm

[motherevol.livejournal.com]

Gosh, maybe. You should go talk to him. His name is Tom Kern. Maybe he can put a good word in for you loco.

p.s. I finally got off my duff and added you as a homie. Word.

Golly, wow!

[locopuff.livejournal.com]

I feel so fattered.

[spacegirllost.livejournal.com]

. . .

your first paragraph. PLEASE don't tell me that you're back where i am now.
hrm... sounds familiar though. sounds very very familiar.

feh. :(

Re:

[blustocking.livejournal.com]

heheh, yeah, pretty much...only the good thing is, I'm not caring as much anymore. I think I feel much better not having to constantly question someone's intentions or determine their honesty level. Some people want to be good, they just can't.

Re:

[spacegirllost.livejournal.com]

:\

we should talk.
really...

i've been fearful about chatting with you for reasons i'd rather not discuss here.

Re:

[blustocking.livejournal.com]

O_o fearful?

I'll be online a lot this weekend I think.

Re:

[spacegirllost.livejournal.com]

fearful for stupid reasons. i'll explain it all at some point.

i sadly won't be around this weekend though. i'm heading back to robert's tomorrow afternoon, so .. perhaps i will write you an email or something if i don't see you online tonight.

Re:

[blustocking.livejournal.com]

okee dokee. :}

[miadzin.livejournal.com]

Hey, you don't know me, but I found your journal via searching people with the interest of "James Joyce." I've got a Joyce community on LJ at j_joyce and, sadly, membership is scarce. If you're interested, I urge you to join.

If this message has upset you in any fashion, I truly am sorry. It just depresses me that over 600 people have "James Joyce" as an interest, and community membership is less then a dozen. I love the man so much that I'm practically begging random people to come talk about him.

7 o'clock PIE

[lagnolalia.livejournal.com]

I can't wait to eat pie with you tomorrow.

Doh. That sounded Kink-Ay!

[blustocking.livejournal.com]

IT'S ALWAYS HIGH TIME FOR PIE TIME!

:D

[buscemi.livejournal.com]

Hey, wait a minute! You're attractive, so why don't you get away with more? :)

7am for a meeting? Damn! I can't even form a complete sentence at that hour. I'm still in consonant soup. :)

Remember that tv show Big Blue Marble? I can picture the logo, but that's about it.

Re:

[blustocking.livejournal.com]

heheh, probably because I don't know it. Or if I do, I don't see it as a valid "bargaining" tool.

I do not remember such a show. Ya wacky biznitch.
;)

Think unsexy thoughts

[buscemi.livejournal.com]

Hey, wait a minute! You're attractive, so why don't you get away with more? :)

7am for a meeting? Damn! I can't even form a complete sentence at that hour. I'm still in consonant soup. :)

Remember that tv show Big Blue Marble? I can picture the logo, but that's about it.

All those books make me think I should try becoming literate again. Maybe I'll go re-read Shock Value. O_o

Re: Think unsexy thoughts

[blustocking.livejournal.com]

I'm having a stupid day. Can't find the right words, incoherent sentences. I just need to take a nap I think, start all over again.

GO READ!

Random replies to the random post

[(Anonymous)]

On attractiveness: My nephew is one damn cute baby, and it's not just me...strangers walk up to his parents and comment on it. I find myself fervently hoping this doesn't jeopradize his developing real character.

AA: It all depends what the blue marble is made of. Y'never know, it might dissolve after all.

Public transportation and dirty thoughts: I'll never look at those subway straps the same again. Thanks. :)

Enjoy your three-day weekend....you deserve the time off!

--rueyeet