p.e.e. e.s.s.

[blustocking]

I'm really too tired to fucking care. I should always be too tired to fucking care. But, truth is, like Faith No More, I do "care a lot". I wish I didn't. Apathy is so much easier. But I'm just not wired that way. I'm wired for optimum caring performance and it often pisses me off and makes me want to kill. HAHA. I kid. It just makes me sad. But for now, I'm too tired to care and that's good enough for the first good night's sleep I'll be having since 2 days ago. Mmm, restless nights and 6:30 am alarms. Could be worse.
It could ALWAYS, be worse.

And no...it's not even what you think it's about...maybe.
Probably a few things.

Some little waitress-chicken flirted with me as I was having breakfast, alone, the other day. That was nice. Being home is such an ego-stoke sometimes. Which is good, because no matter what Mr. Self Esteem says, it's nice to have the occasional outside validation. Especially when you're feeling like dog doo.

Comments

I'll flirt with ya, baby!

[locopuff.livejournal.com]

Ya, I'll shove ICE DOWN YER PANTS! YAARRRR!!

I'll teach your grandmother to suck eggs!!

random thoughts.

[catnamedcosette.livejournal.com]

Why is self-esteem always a mister? I think it's because boys are the bastards of the underworld. Actually, probably just because we rely to heavily on them for validation. Maybe we're the stupid ones.

I thought of you this week (yes, only once, that's all you get - haha). We had a BLIZZARD filled with feet upon feet of snow. We got nearly five feet of snow and were house-bound for four days before finally getting a small path from our house to civilization. The entire city shut down - you even got ticketed if you were on the streets for no good reason! All that snow made me think of what beautiful pictures you could've taken. You would've enjoyed it.

I love it when Cosette sneezes. It's just so cute.

How's the job search going? I'm tempted to boycott this wedding in May although I know I'll probably chicken out. The bride's pissed me off and I'm not really sure I feel like going. You would be the only bright spot of that weekend (I could just stop by the wedding and reception for a brief moment and spend the rest of the weekend having fun with you), but if you aren't there yet, then what fun would a weekend with you be without you? No fun at all. :(

I think I'm delirious so pay no attention to me....